Archive: Why We Came Back to the UM Church

by Kenneth and Elizabeth Borcher Milan, West Milan, Dummer UM Churches, New Hampshire Conference, Milan, New Hampshire

We had had it. Several years of struggle and disappointment with the United Methodist Church had finally come to a head. Nearly every year since 1974, my wife, Liz, and I had prayed for guidance and contemplated leaving the UM Church. In January of 1979 we knew that the time had come to get off the seesaw of indecision and make the break we had long been threatening to do. We could no longer compromise our evangelical beliefs.

Our Bethlehem New Hampshire Church was becoming more and more immersed in the charismatic experience; even our Sunday morning worship service had departed from the traditional and was evolving into a pentecostal happening. Because of this, there was hurt and alienation taking place between traditionalists and charismatics. Fracture of some degree was beginning within the congregation even though there was unprecedented growth occurring in the church. This seemingly growing division, and our dissatisfaction with the UM Church as a denomination (on the national as well as the conference level), a long with a surging desire to be in a totally pentecostal-charismatic atmosphere, led us finally to make our break. I withdrew my full-conference membership and united with the ordained ministry of a pentecostal denomination.

We left our UM churches in March of 1979 and moved to Vermont to begin our new ministry. “There,” I said to Liz, “that takes care of that; no more liberalism. We’re done with Methodism; and now we will have complete freedom to worship the Lord the way we really want to!”

At the time of our leaving the UM Church, many people had lovingly tried to dissuade us. My parents were deeply concerned about our leaving, and for awhile it created a great rift between my father and me. Dad believed so strongly in renewal taking place within our UM structure, and that love was the most important tool of evangelism. However, I turned a deaf ear to those who pleaded with us not to go.

The grass looked so green beyond the UM Church. We thought everything would just fall into place. We poured ourselves into new ministry and found great enjoyment for a time in the pentecostal environment. But, to my great dismay, I found that every situation and denomination has its restrictions and controls, and that true freedom comes only in Jesus Christ, not through a particular set of circumstances.

We encountered restrictions and divisions of a different kind than in the UM Church. We saw jealousy, envy, lack of forgiveness, spiritual pride concerning spiritual gifts and the baptism of the Holy Spirit, and extreme legalism. We had thought that these things would not be so prevalent in a church where the majority were born-again Christians. We felt these problems as binding on the work of the Holy Spirit as the differences between traditionalists and charismatics in our former UM churches.

We were surprised to find that the grass is not necessarily greener over there. Every church and denomination has its own ways of binding the Spirit and grieving our Lord, including evangelical and pentecostal denominations whose sins may be less obvious than those of our mainline churches. Along with the more visible sins of “lustful pleasure, idolatry, spiritism (that is, encouraging the activity of demons) … murder, drunkenness, wild parties …” the Bible lists the sins of “hatred and fighting, jealousy and anger, constant effort to get the best for yourself, complaints and criticisms, the feeling that everyone else is wrong except those in your own little group …” (Galatians 5:19-21 L.B.). Sins are not identified as greater and lesser; each separates us from God, even from inheriting the Kingdom.

In the past we had always exhorted evangelical people who were involved in the church prayer group to stay within the UM Church, to continue their witness there. Now we were the ones in another denomination. We began to recall the faces of lay persons all over the conference whose lives had touched ours. We remembered our Good News article of 1976 encouraging United Methodists to “hang in there.” We had shared the same message on the PTL Club in November of 1977. Many United Methodists responded that in both cases our testimony had given them new hope and encouragement to remain and stand strong in their UM churches. We began to be homesick for the New Hampshire Conference, even though we did not fully understand our vacillating feelings after having cut the cord from Methodism.

At the same time the Holy Spirit began to convict me of other concerns. As I studied the Word of God, I saw time after time where God’s people had stood steadfast in very difficult situations and had maintained a powerful witness: Joseph in Egypt, Daniel in Babylon, Jesus, Peter, and Paul in the New Testament. I recalled the stoning of Stephen, and one thing became very obvious. These people of God had overwhelming love for others in the midst of circumstances. I could see the resentment, judgmentalism, and self-righteousness that had crept into my relationships to fellow UM pastors and laypersons. By the time we had left the UM Church, I, especially, was infected with some attitudes and feelings that in no way gave glory to the Lord.

We saw that stepping from pluralism to strict doctrine does not necessarily bring greater ease in articulating the Gospel. We began classifying Christians within the Body of Christ: those who had the Holy Spirit and those who did not; those who spoke in tongues and those who did not. The Lord convicted us of our lack of love and began a painful process of spiritual surgery, totally without anesthesia.

I came close to leaving the ministry altogether at this time. I experienced a tremendous struggle as I realized what had happened to my Christian life. The Lord burst my pipe dreams of greatness one by one.

In looking back at the UM Church, we found that we missed the creeds and traditional hymns. Yes, we even missed the formal worship setting, the joy and balance in both formal and free forms of worship. We missed, too, the influence of traditionalists and non-charismatics who had kept us on our toes in articulating our evangelical stand and who reminded us of other dimensions of our Christian faith.

During this time of spiritual surgery we were lifted up in prayer and love by many people. God knew our need for support and love in the agony of realizing that we had to go back. He appointed my brother Ray, and his wife, Violet, of the Bethlehem UM Church to the special ministry of standing beside us, encouraging and loving us, both as we left the UM Church and as we returned, even though they were deeply hurt by our decision to leave.

In asking if we could return to the New Hampshire Conference we felt quite embarrassed and a little afraid of the reception and criticism we would receive. However, we knew that part of growing is a willingness to admit where you are, whatever the consequences. A warm and positive response from our district superintendent was followed by the possibility of a three-point charge being open in six weeks, the only appointment left in our conference.

Since I had withdrawn my conference membership (I had been ordained elder in 1974), I had to begin the long process of reentry. I met with the District Committee of the Board of Ordained Ministry and then weeks later with the Conference Board of the Ordained Ministry. The results of these meetings determined whether or not I would receive an appointment. We experienced overwhelming love and affirmation during the whole process from the bishop, superintendents, pastors, and lay people. Much reconciliation took place as I let go of my judgmentalism. The day after the meeting with the Conference Board of the Ordained Ministry, we moved to our new appointment to the Milan, West Milan, and Dummer UM Churches, in northern New Hampshire. I served as a local pastor until May of 1980 when my elder’s orders and full-conference membership were restored by unanimous vote of the New Hampshire Annual Conference.

For the first time in my ministry of 13 years I have found lasting joy and peace. I am content to minister in a rural setting to small churches. God is working in our three churches in ways we had never experienced, with significant growth taking place. Many people are turning to Jesus Christ, growing in His love, and bearing witness to the fruit and gifts of the Holy Spirit. We rejoice most in the holistic atmosphere under which charismatics, non-charismatic evangelicals, traditionalists, and those who feel called to a special ministry of social action have found harmony with a foundation on the Word of God. We keep the Sunday morning service more formal, while encouraging a vibrant and open Tuesday evening prayer and praise meeting—rather than forcing a particular style of worship in every area of church life. We are content to let the Holy Spirit work as He will. As I become involved in conference work once again I also find that the evangelical witness of several years is bearing fruit in many ways.

By returning to the UM Church we are not saying we agree with everything which is said and done by the general church and its boards and agencies. We believe that the Biblical foundations of the UM Church which were built by John Wesley and other early Methodists provide an important balance between the personal and social gospels which must be maintained today.

As we reflect on the events of leaving and returning to the UM Church, Liz and I affirm them as a time of great growth in our Christian walk. The surgery was painful, but necessary, and the Lord strengthened us in it.

In no way do we want to cast an ill light on Pentecostalism, for it has reminded the mainline denominations not to forget the very important work of the Holy Spirit. We do not deny that God may legitimately lead a person out of one denomination into another setting. But, how will the Holy Spirit work in the United Methodist Church unless there are vessels willing to sacrifice their own hearts’ desires and serve Him?

Love is patient and kind; love is not jealous or boastful; it is not arrogant or rude. Love does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrong, but rejoices in the right. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things (I Corinthians 13:4-7 R.S.V.).