Archive: Prayer for Busy People

An interview with Margaret Therkelson

“We busy people have to be patient with ourselves about our prayer lives and say, ‘Lord, I’m doing the best I can.’ He’s saying, ‘I know you are. Where you are is okay. Start where you are.’”

Good News: I’m a busy person and I’ve had a hard time developing a disciplined prayer life. I feel guilty about that, which seems to prevent me from getting started. What do I do?

Therkelsen: The guilt is a false guilt. The enemy wants us to feel that if we haven’t had our quiet time then we can’t tune in to God. That is not true. If we don’t have our quiet time, we can still open ourselves to God throughout the day by loving Him through praise, through confession, through repentance. The main thing He wants is for us to be with Him moment by moment.

The purpose of the quiet time is to stimulate us to tune in to God at any time. So practicing the presence of God is as valid an experience in prayer as any designated quiet time.

Good News: So if I go for several days without having a quiet time, can I still be practicing the presence of God throughout the day?

Therkelsen: Absolutely. During a time of deep fatigue recently, I sensed the Lord saying, “You need to rest. Don’t get up at 5:00; don’t get up at 6:00. But the minute you awaken, say, ‘Lord, here I am. My deepest desire is to be close to You.'”

During those days I did spend time in prayer, but later in the morning. We can be flexible about our spending time with God. If I’m fatigued, He understands that better than I do. Psalm 103 says He knows my frame. But we don’t know Him well enough to know how well He knows us. He’s not keeping score. We can just begin right where we are. The main thing He wants is my turning to Him. Any way I do that is legitimate.

Good News: When we’re busy, we sense all our anxiety. How do we sense God’s being with us?

Therkelsen: There’s where the quiet time comes in. As it is, our anxieties are saying the problem is bigger than God. But as we spend time with Him, we begin realizing our heavenly Father is bigger than any problem. Nothing is too hard for Him. Prayer is to teach us we need Him.

In our twenties and thirties and early forties it’s very difficult to realize how much we need God because we are so self-assured, so capable, so strong, so smart, so educated. We can go half on God’s strength and half on our own strength. I did for years. But we learn by falling on our faces that we can’t go through a work day and practice the presence unless we’re drawing on God. So the best pattern is having a daily quiet time and daily practicing the presence all through the day. They feed off of one another.

Good News: In our busyness, we want everything to shape up now, including our spiritual lives. How do we have patience with our spiritual progress?

Therkelsen: Our spiritual life is a journey with many different stages and seasons. The saddest thing in the Church universal is that we’ve taught about one or two experiences with God when, in reality, those early experiences are the headwaters of a marvelous river that goes on and on. We need to have 100,000 experiences with God. The Word says in I Peter 5:10, “Let your heart be established,” but the heart is only established over a long road of intentional growth.

We do want a cheap, quick spirituality. But there can be great periods of darkness and confusion; there are long periods of a form of godliness that have absolutely no power; there are great periods of God’s silence. But these are times we learn much about God and about ourselves.

It’s a long, rugged journey. But it is a glorious journey.

Good News: How do we keep from feeling defeated when we hear about the great saints who prayed three and four hours a day?

Therkelsen: I (and many people) stress begin by praying just 15 minutes a day. If you miss it just say, “Lord, I missed it. I’ll try tomorrow.” It’s okay.

We already have too much pressure. So when it comes to prayer we say, “God, I can’t pray. I have all the pain I can handle. If I come to You, I’m going to have more pain because I’m afraid You’re going to be rough with me for all my failures.”

We have to be patient with ourselves about our prayer lives and say, “Lord, I’m doing the best I can.” He’s saying, “I know you’re doing the best you can. It’s okay. Where you are is okay.”

Good News: Is there any hope that a young mother who has three children under the ages of seven can have a fruitful prayer life?

Therkelsen: Actually, she has a marvelous opportunity to be in constant prayer. The sweetest thing she can do is to pray while she’s changing the diapers of her babies, as she’s cooking for those babies, as she’s hugging and kissing those babies, as she’s washing those magnificent little bodies. Prayer can be mingled with everything she’s doing.

Some of the purest praying today is going on in the hearts of young mothers. They’re praying and loving and loving and praying.

Good News: How do you move into a more intimate relationship with God?

Therkelsen: First, we have to be willing to be different. Probably the biggest stigma in our Church universal is that we all want to be alike. So we have to say, “Lord I want to go on a journey. No matter what the experiences are, I want to walk with You.”

Second, we need to draw around us a network of people who are also on the journey and understand us. I believe the old need to be giving spiritual direction to young Christians. I don’t think we can do much growing without that. Timothy had Lois and Eunice; Paul had Gamaliel; Jesus had the Father and the Holy Ghost. We’re in grave danger because we’ve just left our young people to sink or swim, and they’re sinking because they’re not being taught. I truly believe the one-on-one ministry of Jesus is as significant as His large, corporate ministry to the masses. Today we desperately need to be ministered to—one-on-one.

Third, we need to be willing to give God time—maybe an hour a day—in prayer.

Good News: What are the consequences of a busy person not spending time with God?

Therkelsen: Eventually, the consequences will be devastating. That person will find out (1) I can’t do this on my own; (2) I’m not in touch enough with God to be a vessel (and there’s no greater joy than being a vessel for God); (3) nothing works for me because I’m in the flesh, not in the Spirit of God.

That person will live with the guilt of living in disobedience to the Bible’s constant admonishing to draw nigh to God and to Jesus’ example of drawing apart to do what He is doing now in Heaven—praying.

I think Thomas Merton was the one who said, “We have as much of God as we want.” And if we don’t want any more of God, that’s our choice.

So, I say to the busy people who are going on without God, “That’s your choice.” That’s probably what they need to do for a while, until they rediscover their great dependency on God. In time, they will come to the end of themselves.

I’ve been on this journey all my life, and I have gone down about every road there is. I had 15 pitiful years of just saying “forget the whole thing.” That was good for me because in those 15 years I found out I was on my own. That was terrifying. We have to come to the end of ourselves, and that often comes as we leave God’s company.

The amazing thing to me is that God in His wondrous Calvary love never gives up on us, but yearns over us all the days of our lives. No matter which road we take, God is going to be waiting at the end of the road for us. He is waiting for us to come to Him.